January 5, 2014
Is it odd that I couldn't wait until today? Today is the start of the first full week of the new year. Its first full week back to work after the holidays. The first week that my "regular" schedule isn't interrupted by a holiday, a day off or a snow day (hopefully). The first week of tracking my food. The start of a new training schedule. The start of a study schedule for my exams. It feels like the Sunday night before the first day of school. I am excited, I am nervous, I am ready. Back on a schedule... dare I say, back to "normal?"
I am not sure I want to say "normal." I am not even sure I know what "normal" is. I am pretty sure that I, myself, am not "normal." Even more than that, I don't think I want to be "normal." However, after saying "normal" that many times in a row, I now know it is one of those crazy words that makes absolutely no sense the more you say it... and may not actually be a real word.
One of the things I have been working on is to get rid of the "normal" and the "schedule" in my life. I am a list person. I like to eat the same thing every day, at the same time. I like routine. Kinda the reason I like to get up at 4:45am and go to the gym every day, because it is part of my schedule, my very own normal. There has to be a balance though. I am finding that I may have sunk myself into a groundhog day kind of schedule rather than a helpful kind of schedule. The goal now is to take my schedule and shuffle the things I can shuffle around a little bit and not allow myself to get stuck.
I love starting my day with the gym... the change will be the mindset while I am there. There are things to work on, things to get better at, things that have been put aside way to long. Work is busy and I will continue to push myself to get as far as I can day after day. Its when I leave work and head home the going gets rough (if I actually leave work on time). The instinct kicks in to plop down on the couch with the mindset of "hey I did enough today" and thats that. No, no, no, no... that is the time to push. Its time to go to the next level. I am not ok where I am right now, I need more. I want more. There are videos to watch, books to read, things to get done. These are the things I need to "schedule" into my days. The shows I DVR are not going to magically disappear if I don't watch them right away... I have to do something new every day. Learn, absorb and grow every single day. Be better in all ways tomorrow than I am right now today.
Screw normal... who wants to be normal anyway?!